Five Simple Self Care Rituals for Moms (That Don’t Cost Anything)
Let’s talk about self care during motherhood.
Maybe you think it’s about an expensive massage, or an elaborate bubble bath, or just doing less, and resting more. But self care is also about the simple ways we hold and speak to ourselves.
Why should I make time for myself (“I’m fine, I’m strong, I can do it”) when there are babies and small children and teenagers and partners and laundry and dishes and groceries and tidying up and paying bills and booking appointments?
I know that voice inside that says I’ll take care of myself when this is done, when I’ve finished the dishes, or when everything is neat and tidy and organized.
But let’s be honest – how exhausted are you by the time you’ve finished all of that? How much energetic weight are you carrying on your shoulders after all these years? It’s time to lay some of that down.
All you need it a little time, energy, and space.
Here are five simple self care rituals (that don’t cost anything!)
Give yourself 15 minutes before everyone in your house wakes up and light a candle. Make a cosy drink and pick up a journal. Write five things you’re grateful for, and how you want to feel today. (Shameless Mom Academy has a great download for this process called the 15 Minute Manifest.) Getting in tune with yourself and where you’re at is the first step to self care.
Stand up straight with your shoulders back and your head held high. So much of modern day motherhood involves a curling of the shoulders and neck. Carrying a baby or a toddler in our arms, breastfeeding or bottle feeding, doing dishes, cooking, driving a car and yes, holding a phone – all of these every day activities cause us to hunch and slouch. Practice pulling your shoulders back (or find a gadget that can help remind you, or better yet, post it notes strategically placed!) and raise your chin so that it’s at a 90 degree angle to the floor. Your energy, your mood, and your motivation will improve.
The element of water is a powerful conduit and assists us in releasing energy, or what the mainstream calls de-stressing – particularly when the water is warm and when magnesium (Epsom) salts, are added. So when your baby is napping, run yourself a bath, light a candle and let it all go. When you are processing lots of emotion or in a high stress period, make sure to also drink a lot of water to help the energy pass through your body.
Practice being in this moment, and nowhere else. Motherhood is a spiritual path unlike no other. You don’t need to spend months in a monastery or an ashram – motherhood will teach you about presence and patience faster than any of that, but only if you are a willing student. Let go of what happened in the past (process, process, process your trauma in healthy ways, learn from what happened, and make a commitment to grow from it in a positive manner) and stop worrying about what happened in the future. Worrying is not going to change it. Be in action. Be in the now. Be present with your children, with your sacred work. Without presence, you will feel stressed, rushed, frustrated, resistant, and it will all go by without you really being there.
We all live on planet earth right now. We are born of her, and we will return to her. Mother earth provides us everything we could possibly need to survive – the materials for our homes, cities and transportation, the medicines for our bodies, the food and water we need every day. Our bodies are held by gravity to her body for a reason. Our bodies are meant to be in contact with her. The electromagnetic field of the earth operates on our body similar to the way a mother or father’s body calms and relaxes a newborn baby. Without that energetic contact, we are unable to thrive.
Simply placing your bare feet on the dirt, the grass, the sand, the stones, is enough to replenish our bodies and repair the impact of stress in our lives. We know that walking along the beach is particularly relaxing – it’s because the crashing waves generate negative ions in the air, which attach to the positive ions in our energy field created by stress or inflammation. (Bentonite clay does the same thing, add it to your bath!) Whether you live near the ocean or can simply put your feet on the dirt, the earth is your ally in your journey towards self care.
What are you favorite self-care rituals and do you give yourself the time to ritualize them, meaning do you practice them every day? You don’t have to do them well, or even for very long, but the more we can tune in with what’s going in our bodies, the happier all of our bodies will be.
Ps. Eckhart Tolle has a great sentiment which I’ll try to paraphrase: “If you are not either enjoying, enthusiastic or accepting of any given moment, stop what you are doing immediately and do something else. Otherwise, you will be perpetuating suffering for yourself and all those around you.” These words have helped me immensely to stay in alignment with my highest vibration.
Love to all x